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Back & Forth

by Jim McGrath

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1.
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Lately I've been Pushed by a wall Full of faces I've Never seen before I feel like I'm Supposed to conquer them all But I don't have The strength anymore I'm always alone But I've had friends Who always helped me Make a brighter day Now that they're gone My hope's at an end And I just can't find Another way No, I'm done Cuz there's no-one Nobody else Or at least that's how I feel right now If I take my time, it'll all work out When you're stressed, it's easy to forget That the thing you need most is a friend To be there For you Even when you're so scared Or blue (INSTRUMENTAL BREAK) Now I've had some space to think things through, I know just what I'm gonna do I'm gonna get out there and try again To see if I can make a friend To be there For me To make me feel alright And free
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I float down the river alone Trying to find a place to call my own And just then, I see you standing there And I know, I won't go anywhere Our eyes meet, our hearts beat faster now We hold hands as we swim down the stream I'll kiss you under the blooming bough You'll show me that this is not a dream Under the moonlight, I'll hold you so tight As fireflies surround us, The glow they make astounds us But it wouldn't matter if the whole world were gone As long as you're here, that's where I belong So let's stay together, until the end of time Now and forever, you are mine Dawn breaks, the sun shines So brightly through the vines But you're not here to share it You've left me, I can't bear it I sit here, waiting for your return Alone again, for you I'll always yearn But just then, I see you standing there And I know, I won't go anywhere
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Rising early to catch That morning breeze Deciding which way we will go Cast our anchors And sail the seven seas To places we have never known There's adventure And treasure to be found, Around this beautiful briny blue And together, We're gonna break new ground, We'll see to that, I promise you No matter what we face, We'll keep moving, hand in hand Someday, we'll discover The promised land Sailing t'wards uncharted seas And new horizons, Endless possibilities Are waiting just for us Despite the trials and tribulations, We'll take them on with no fuss It's a brand new age for man, A time to explore, Going all around the world To see what we can find And even when we're done, There's always more For someone else in time (SOLO) No matter what we face, We'll keep moving, hand in hand Someday, we'll discover The promised land Sailing t'wards uncharted seas And new horizons, Endless possibilities Are waiting just for us Despite the trials and tribulations, We'll take them on with no fuss It's a brand new age for man, A time to explore, Going all around the world To see what we can find And even when we're done, There's always more For someone else cuz It's a brand new age for man, A time to explore, Going all around the world To see what we can find And even when we're done, There's always more For someone else in time
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Misty-eyed, I'm running back to The beach where she died The tide is in and full of my tears I can't believe it's been so long The sun has set, on her and Everything I love, I regret Not spending time with her out here I can't believe that she's still gone (Misty) You were the love of my life (Misty) But now my heart's full of strife (Misty) It's getting harder to smile (Misty) It's getting harder to justify Living, without you Can you forgive me? I don't know if I want to Be Winter's come, but even with the seasons, I just can't move on Her laughter's all I hear in my mind I feel so numb, but not from the snow Summer's here, but not even the sun Can make her disappear Her love is all I want to find I feel so burned, but not from the glow (Misty) You were the love of my life (Misty) But now my heart's full of strife (Misty) It's getting harder to smile (Misty) It's getting harder to justify Living, without you Can you forgive me? I don't know if I can bear to Be (Misty) x8 (Misty) You were the love of my life (Misty) But now my heart's full of strife (Misty) And I can't bother to smile (Misty) And I can't bother to justify Living, without you Can you forgive me? I don't know, but I'll find out Soon
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Say the words, To calm me down Say the words, To lift me up Say the words, To call me around Say the words, To give me trust in you I'm all alone Without a home There's nowhere to go There's no-one I know But there you were And then I heard My heart thumping, Your fingers strumming The strings of my soul, It fills up the hole Left behind Deep inside When you Say the words, To calm me down Say the words, To lift me up Say the words, To call me around Say the words, To give me trust in you (x2) Your smile was bright It lit the night I felt so warm Like never before Then suddenly You looked at me And I knew That we two Had found a new romance So let's take a chance Today Let's find a new way to Say the words, To calm me down Say the words, To lift me up Say the words, To call me around Say the words, To give me trust in you (x2)
20.
I'd like to leave me alone That my soul was in Another home I want to leave me alone Sometimes I'm often fine Most of the time, I'm quite tolerable But there are days When I get crazy, And I become so insufferable My words get dumb, My thoughts even dumber, God, I'm a pain At best, I suck At worst, I'm a fucker Who drives myself so insane I know it doesn't last for very long But who cares when my brain keeps going wrong? So when you tell me to leave, I hope that you can believe That I'd like to leave me alone That my soul was in Another home I want to leave me alone Sometimes Yes, I'd like to leave me alone Let me rot away All on my own I want to leave me alone Sometimes They say it's grand They understand, That's how people are It's hard to know How far that trust goes, When I become so bizarre Cuz every time I seem to come around My mind keeps pushing me into the ground Although you think I'm the worst, You're really far from the first To say I'd like to leave me alone Wish my soul was in Another home I want to leave me alone Sometimes Yes, I'd like to leave me alone Let me rot away All on my own I want to leave me alone Sometimes (INSTRUMENTAL BREAK) But then it all calms down and I'm okay Enough to live and see another day, Perhaps I'll still turn out mad Yet I'm still kinda glad That I'd like to stay by my side Yes, despite it all, My soul is fine I want to stay by my side Sometimes Although I'd like to leave me alone For now, it's good Inside my home I want to leave me alone Some other time
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Go to sleep, little one Rest your eyes, have some fun In your dreams, til tomorrow The sun'll rise, and good times will follow You, wherever you will go (will go) It's true, cuz in your heart you know (you know that) That there's a beautiful world around you (around you) With friends and family who'll surround you (surround you) With love (with love) Forever (forever more) You'll stay (you'll stay) Together (together) Although things will be great someday It's still another dream away So till then, Close your eyes And go to sleep
25.
Stolen dreams Are they not what they seem? Memoirs of days Spent with you Times gone by, When our hopes dared to fly Was it just a phase Or was it true? I'm alone again, Sorrow with no end, Wishing for the day You would return Oh, if only to prove you were real, Show my heart could feel Love like we once shared That's all I yearn for Life was sweet, We would dance down the street Kiss under the moon Holding hands But now it's gone, How can I dare go on? My world's full of gloom With no second chance So I try to sleep, Though it can't be too deep, Or else I'll hear you say "Stay with me now" But no matter how much, I will still awake And my heart will break Cuz you're no longer there Please, help me out! Stolen dreams Are they not what they seem? Memoirs of days Spent with you
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Staring through glass Into distant space, Seeing the stars In all their wondrous grace But there's just one That's not a passing dream, Our lunar love Who sits across the sea His face so pure, His glow so white, His beauty so magical, It sweeps me away I must be sure, I must be right, I must be rational, That he will stay forever Let me sink into The sea of serenity, Let him whisk me Into the night Let me drown In the ocean of his love, Let him hold me Tight On cloudy nights, Are you so alone? When no-one's there to Watch your beautiful glow Just give it time, Cuz soon the skies will clear And I'll be there To see you once again, my dear To gaze upon, To stare so wide-eyed, To bask with disbelief, In all of your glory Our love will live on, Our dream will never subside, Our hopes will one day weave, The most amazing story Let me sink into The sea of serenity, Won't you whisk me Into the night Let me drown In the ocean of your love, Won't you hold me Tight Let me sink into The sea of serenity, Let him whisk me Into the night Let me drown In the ocean of his love, Let him hold me Tight
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When Big Larry came 'round just to put him down, SpongeBob turned into a clown; And no one ever wants to dance With a fool who went and ripped his pants! I know I shouldn't mope around; I shouldn't curse, But the pain feels so much worse. Cause windin' up with no one is a lot less fun Than a burn from the sun, or sand in your buuuuns! Now I learned a lesson I won't soon forget, So listen and you won't regret, Be true to yourself; don't miss your chance, And you won't end up like the fool who ripped his pants!
31.
It's misty in the mountains I can barely see see a thing But I'll still get up anyway And do my best to sing While I work on that there fountain And grow new crops of food Cuz it's the start of a brand new day And I can make it good For myself and everyone who lives around me The people, the animals and the whole wide world Despite the morning fog that still surrounds me, I'll give it a whirl It couldn't hurt surely Let's till the field for cabbage, And maybe carrots too, But I don't mind if they're not up There's plenty left to do Like I'll play the goat at cribbage Before the milking ends He may not play it well, but I'll treat him like a friend Cuz I'm not the only one who really matters; There's the people, the animals and the whole wide world It's important to help each other in these matters I'll give it a whirl It couldn't hurt surely It's misty in the mountains I can barely see see a thing But I'll still get up anyway And do my best to sing While I work on that there fountain And grow new crops of food Cuz it's the start of a brand new day And I'll try to make it good
32.
Seasons come And seasons go Wherever we may roam Winter rain And summer shine, It always feels so fine Just as long As you are there, I lose all my cares Loving you, Only you, It's true Falling leaves And hollow trees, Can never dampen your Smile so bright It gives the light, That shines forever more Through the months And through the years, You dry all my tears Loving you, Only you, It's true Spring or summer's not too hot, Autumn or winter's not too cold, When your love's the thing I got, Life will never get too old (Piano solo) Lying in the evening breeze, Laughing in the morning chill, Loving fills our hearts with ease, Loving gives us such a thrill Seasons come And seasons go Wherever we may roam Winter rain And summer shine, It always feels so fine Just as long As you are there, I lose all my cares Loving you, Only you, It's true Falling leaves And hollow trees, Can never dampen your Smile so bright It gives the light, That shines forever more Through the months And through the years, You dry all my tears Loving you, Only you, It's true Loving you, Only you, It's true
33.
I don't know Why I feel the way that I do When I'm around you, I just can't explain? It's hard to say How you turn that frown of mine upside down Yet it's so astounding That I'll catch the train And try to reach you Before you close up today I wanna beseech you Then maybe you can see the way The way I see you Deep inside whenever you're there I'm not lying, I swear For you, I'll go anywhere No matter how long it takes, I'm more than happy to wait Even though we're many miles away I'll sing this song with a smile I'll try to make it worthwhile Just to see if you might feel the same Oh darling, I would be so glad If we could wander, hand in hand, Then we could laugh all summer Laugh and love all summer long (INSTRUMENTAL BREAK) I'll try to reach you Before you close up today I wanna beseech you Then maybe you can see the way The way I'm feeling Deep inside whenever you're there I'm not lying, I swear For you, I'll go anywhere No matter how long it takes, I'm more than happy to wait Even though we're many miles away I'll sing this song with a smile I'll try to make it worthwhile Just to see if you might feel the same Oh darling, I would be so glad If we could wander, hand in hand, Then we could laugh all summer Laugh and love all summer long
34.

about

A very long, all over the place kind of album.

Most of this music was made for various things over the last year and a half - mainly for class projects or assignments from the college I'm attending as of writing this (that'll be University College Cork), but also for personal experiments, abandoned album or work ideas, and even a commissioned project. It's also very inconsistent in recording quality, especially for the vocal songs, as plenty of the 2021 stuff was made in a rush to reach deadlines that I was struggling with due to personal circumstances.

And yes, I said vocal songs. This is the first time I've actually attempted to sing music and post it onto the internet in many years. I tried it once back in 2013 or thereabouts, but I didn't have enough confidence in my singing ability to keep it up. However, I've been interested in writing lyrics for some time. Creating lyrics and the art of writing melodies around them (or vice versa) to make songs where both elements complement each other has been on my mind a lot, and I wanted to try and do something about it.

One of the classes I picked for my college course was a Songwriting class, where you mainly had to write and submit three songs per semester. They could be at any point in progress, just so long as you had words to submit, and I used that opportunity to explore my songwriting sensibilities. The recording and arrangement quality for them is particularly inconsistent, and I'm always rather scared that the songs themselves suffer greatly because I'm the one singing them, but I'm indescribably happy to have gotten the chance to figure out how I write lyrics.

Because this album goes back and forth in recording, arrangement and compositional quality, to the point where I've included a bonus folder with random projects and songs I feel too uncertain or embarrassed about to include on the main folder, I feel that maybe it's best to call this Back & Forth.

But in a way, no matter what the end result is, I've still learned something from creating each and every track featured on the album. That's the most important thing. I can never say for certain whether I'll do another album in the near future, simply because I don't plan on it until I have enough music where I figure I might as well put something together (which is basically what happened with this one). But I can move forward a bit more confidently, knowing that at least these are done and out there in the world. Maybe I'll revisit some of them, or maybe I'll just move on.

Either way, this is the album I've made, and I hope that you've found or will find something to enjoy. Thank you again for listening and reading, and I hope you have a wonderful day.

-Jim McGrath (aka FrDougal9000/Apollo Chungus)

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Special Thanks To:

The community of the Big Orchestral Action Music Thread on FFShrine and Squid-Board
The community of the World Animation Discord
MartyMcflies
My family and friends

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In memory of

Shunsuke Kikuchi (1931-2021)
Katsuhisa Hattori (1936-2020)
Near/byuu (d. 2021)

credits

released July 23, 2021

MAIN DISC

Composed by

Jim McGrath (tracks 1-4; 6-11; 14-20; 22-24; 27; 31; 33-34)
Jim McGrath & Nobaddy (track 13)

Features traditional songs (tracks 5 & 26)

Features compositions by

Yoko Kanno (track 12)
Masato Koike (track 21)
Yuji Ohno (track 25)
Michiru Oshima (track 28)
Peter Strauss & Paul Tibbitt (track 30)
Sumochi (track 32)

Arranged by
Jim McGrath (tracks 1-5; 7-11; 13-31; 33-34)
KWfoxy (track 6)
Yoko Kanno (track 12)
Sumochi (track 32)

Lyrics by

Jim McGrath (tracks 2; 6; 12; 15; 19-20; 24-25; 31-33)
Peter Strauss & Paul Tibbitt (track 30)

Vocals by Jim McGrath (tracks 2; 6; 12; 15; 19-20; 24-25; 29-33)

BONUS DISC

Remixed by

Jim McGrath (tracks 1-6)

Composed by

Jim McGrath (tracks 7-12)

Features compositions by

RYU and Pejman "Funk Fiction" Roozbeh (track 1)
Nine Inch Nails & Spiralmouth (track 2)
Martin Lascelles (track 3)
The Pillows and Oasis (track 4)
Shiro Sagisu and SlamGrene (track 5)
Tatsuro Yamashita, Yoko Kanno, Piero Umiliani, Dean Evans, Guillaume de Machaut & Evanescence (track 6)

Arranged by Jim McGrath (tracks 7-12)

Lyrics by RYU (track 1)
Trent Reznor (track 2)
Mike Wyzgowski (track 3)
Noel Gallagher (track 4)
Guillaume de Machaut, Amy Lee & Tony Belsamo (track 6)
Jim McGrath (tracks 8 & 12)

Vocals by

Irving Louis Lattin & Dred Foxx (track 1)
Michael Blanchard, Antonio Sol, Becky Kneubuhl, Vi Le, Chris Miller, & Gabriel Mann (track 2)
Tyrone Henry & Kash Rex (track 3)
Noel Gallagher (track 4)
Donald Grieg, Robert Macdonald, Robert Harre-Jones, Angus Smith, Mark Dobell, & Amy Lee (track 6)
Jim McGrath (tracks 8 & 12)

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Jim McGrath Cork, Ireland

A musician who wants to make the best music he possibly can.

Inspired by:

Shiro Sagisu
Tomoyuki Asakawa
Ronnie Hazlehurst
Victoria Wood
The Divine Comedy
Mike Wyzgowski
Spiralmouth
... more

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